UnMasking the Career Pivot

I consider myself a Xennial (half millennial/half generation X). I remember when we had to use a dial to turn the TV, rotary dial phones, and payphones. I also am part of the internet boom and the start of convenience. No longer did we need phone books because we had google. We also didn’t need to memorize numbers because they were stored on our phones. We also have calculators in our pockets now which the teacher swore we wouldn’t have. We also were sold a dream of success and all we had to do was go to college and then we’d make the big bucks and be set for life. Many of us followed this path and for many of us, that path led to destruction. Okay, maybe that’s a little dramatic but it did lead us to an uncomfortable destination. One now in which we are questioning because it doesn’t align with who we are, our strengths, or what makes us happy. Welcome to navigating the career pivot.

One of the definitions of a pivot by Mariam-Webster is : usually a marked change. Similar to what I’m going through now. A career pivot. Of course as always I try to highlight what I either went through or am going through with hopes that you can find some commonality and not feel alone if you feel the same way.

I’ve mentioned before that I’m not meant to be a corporate baddie in a previous post titled: Unmasked - What Fear is Teaching me about Success. Because of all the masking I’ve done all my life I tried to check the boxes instead of doing what authentically felt right to me. This meant I went to school and fought my way through, got a job in my major, got fired from that job and that should have been my wake up call but it wasn’t. The thing is I always knew that there was something off, I could never last more than a year before boredom struck and performance went down. I blamed myself for the poor performance not realizing that maybe you were doing something you weren’t meant to do.

Down the line, poor performance became the norm, I’d start out as a rock star but if I stayed longer than a year then the cracks would show. I would disengage and over the years this led to burnout and a very high anxiety. Which brings me to the present. I’ve been at my current job for 3 years and to be honest cracks have been showing for awhile. I have so much anxiety when it comes to going to work that I checked myself into a PHP program because it became unbearable. That’s when I learned it may be time to pivot.

I had to take a hard look at myself, what I enjoy, what brings me joy and figure out a career path from there. This was hard because I’m still programmed to believe the lies of the corporate world but in my heart of hearts I am an entrepreneur. I value my time being my time to spend as I please and not spending it to the point I’m drained at the end of every day trying to survive. It’s time for a change, I no longer want to survive, I want to thrive.

Now is the hard part. What do I pivot to? Finding an office job is safe but it’s not what I want. Furthermore, I have kids that I need to provide for so now isn’t really the time to experiment. But I need something to give me life. How do I pivot and still take care of my kids?

To answer these questions is where I lean on my faith. I’ve been making decisions (not always logical) based on what I feel God is telling me to do. Even at this moment right now, I’m not sure where I’m going but I’m still choosing to trust God. When thinking about trusting God one person that I am fascinated with in the bible is Abraham (known as Abram at the time). In Genesis 12:1-4, God told him to leave everything he knows and go to a place where I will show you. Not only did he not know where he was going, he left everything familiar to follow God’s word. How many of us will do this now? How many of us will leave comfort and familiarity to follow what God has told us to do. That’s where I am now. Will I make another move that takes me into unfamiliar territory and trust God along the way? Or will I stay miserable where I am and try to still work on this career pivot? Has anyone out there made a major leap with no safety net but God?